AN OPEN LETTER TO SHENAZ TREASURYWALA

Posted: December 15, 2014 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

IS MY COUNTRY REALLY SO UNSAFE? IS EVERY MAN OUT THERE A RAPIST?

Dear Shenaz,

I read your Open Letter to some of the most Influential Men in India asking them to do something “URGENTLY” to protect women of this country. The accounts you shared in your letter are horrific and no girl should go through an experience like that.  Easier said than done…I know. I am a woman and I can correlate with the pain but Shenaz I would like to draw your attention towards something that no one today talks about and also urge you to write few more Open Letters after reading mine to you.

You ask a question again and again in your letter. Why was the driver in Uber case let go when he was caught for rape last time? Don’t you think you should ask this question to the woman who compromised the case and he was set free? Don’t you think you should ask this question to many women who are first accusing men of rape or threatening men of rape cases and then later settling those cases either before the FIR or after the FIR or after the man has been in Jail or during the trial by turning hostile? I am not saying all but majority of these cases are settled by financial compensation.  I wish to ask you Shenaz, how can pain/crime be bartered with Money? If a rapist can give money and get away, isn’t he getting a license to rape again? Or was it never a Rape?

You seem to have a specific hatred towards Delhi, let me give you some data. I know the premise of your letter is emotional and I should not get into data. But in this age where data is thrown at our face time and again to establish an argument, I think I need to. In an in-depth research by THE HINDU of 1636 rape cases filed in the capital in 2013 (post Nirbhaya), it found that “one-fifth of the cases were wound up because complainant did not appear or turned hostile. Out of the cases fully tried, over 40% dealt with consensual sex, usually involving the elopement of a young couple and girl’s parents subsequently charging boy with rape and another 25% dealt with “breach of promise to marry.” So basically 65% cases were not what we normally believe rape is. While you ask many questions to Men, don’t you think you should also question women who are filing rape cases on promise of marriage or job or promotion or after any kind of promise remains unfulfilled if it is rape? Here’s something a Court in Delhi said – False rape cases behind Delhi’s tag of Rape Capital – Delhi Court).  Knowing this, do you still feel Delhi is very UNSAFE?

You said you feel very safe on streets of Harlem, the Bronx and Brooklyn and not the same in India. I would like to give you some more data Shenaz. The reported rape rate in India is 2.0 per 100000 population while it is 28.6 in US. I think you are intelligent enough to draw conclusions and also consider that this 2.0 is after the kind of cases mentioned above. I must also tell you that anywhere in the world, a false accusation of rape leads to stringent punishment while in my country; you can find eight years of live in relationship turned into rape and there is rarely any punishment given to false accuser. I beg to ask you Shenaz is MY INDIA so UNSAFE?

I am a woman from Delhi NCR. India Gate is one of the most visited places and I have been there several times, pretty late in the night and it’s the safest spots you could ever be at. I urge you to go yourself and check out. I have also been on streets in Bandra late in the night, alone, coming back from work. I did not feel unsafe. Maybe I did not let that unnecessary fear creep in my mind which I am constantly being fed with.

I don’t know if you would read this, but I wish to invite you to meet some people – A young boy who has been labelled a rapist since he broke up with his girlfriend who was cheating on him! The case was filed a year after break up without an iota of medical evidence. Daughter of an old man who hanged himself as he was falsely accused of rape by his tenant when he asked for rent. A family where every man is constantly under threat of rape case by daughter in law as they are in a bitter legal battle! Do you think there pain is any less than that of a woman who is genuinely abused?

Your letter invites sympathy. But sorry Shenaz your powerful call screams of personal prejudice labelling all Men of my Country as Rapists. Yes there are pervert minds – who grope women, who touch women, who beat up women, who abuse women but does it mean that every man of this country is like that? Your letter adds to the cacophony around rape without suggesting any possible solution. We already have laws which are extremely stringent. You asked for death penalty, I wonder if you would really want Men accused of rape in cases like I quoted above to be HANGED? Also you want every man who touches a woman punished….Like Really?

Through this letter, I am asking you to consider drafting an OPEN LETTER AGAIN, not to FAMOUS MEN but MEN AND WOMEN WHO CAN DO SOMETHING

An Open Letter to Chief Justice of India or the Home Minister asking for Police Reforms and Judicial Reforms – things India desperately needs to dispose of cases early and impart quick justice. We have shortage of workforce in both – Judiciary and Police. There are more than 3 CRORE cases pending in our Courts. Maybe your letter pushes them to do something!

An Open Letter to Police to do fair investigation, not take BRIBE in such cases and punish the wrong doer whether it’s a man who has committed the crime or a woman levelling false allegations!

An Open Letter to – Women who are misusing laws as a tool to settle scores because they feel privileged to do so, Women who engage in a consensual relationship first and later term it rape when promise (whether it was made or not) remains unfulfilled, Women who turn any fight into a molestation case, Women who file such serious cases and later settle it with money!

An Open Letter to those Parents who think their daughters cannot make her choice of a life partner and accuse boyfriend of rape.

An Open Letter to MEDIA that only shows us stories when a case is filed and not when a case is closed and authenticity of that case.

An Open letter to EVERY CITIZEN of India to be a little more HUMAN to each other and treat each other as HUMANS because we have perhaps stopped seeing each other as human beings and are constantly driven by our egos, anger, hate, revenge and negative sides of ourselves.

Crime against women isn’t the only crime happening in India Shenaz. But, yes it is the only crime being discussed. As if there’s nothing else happening! It’s great that you are concerned about safety of women in my country but why doesn’t the rising graph of crime in entire society bother you or for that matter anyone? What you and lot of other people are constantly indulging in – is labelling entire manhood as criminals. It is also expected that every man accepts this label sitting down, even if he is most respectful to women around him because if he argues, he would be given another label – Male Chauvinist. Personally, the number of men I have seen helping women in hour of need or otherwise is much larger in number than the ones who violate them but these men are rarely applauded (who remembers Nirbhaya’s friend now). So this generalization is tad too uncalled for! Moreover the men you have chosen to write to…..No personal comments but many of them have their own share of past with women!Think

I would end this by urging you to write a FINAL OPEN LETTER – asking women to be BRAVE as the world is TOUGH (I don’t know how many girls are still continuing with those self defense classes that became a rage after Nirbhaya) If I abuse, it would be stupid to think a man would not abuse me just because I am a woman.  If we are asking for equality, let it be TRUE EQUALITY and not playing victim card as per convenience. Otherwise the entire cry for equality is a farce. THINK about it before you write the NEXT OPEN LETTER!

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Comments
  1. Cool!
    Deepika, you’re a rockstar!
    but as I said before to you, I think Shehnaz is simply riding the wave of “women empowerment” like many others, as this gives instant publicity & social respect, a little more than what she’d otherwise earn in her present stature.
    as I said before “WOMEN EMPOWERMENT” is an open brand that anyone can use without having to pay royalty, a brand that can sell anything from tea-powder to films to cars. its free for all

    http://brand-women-empowerment.blogspot.in/

  2. deepak kaushik says:

    Dear Shenaz,
    I had to Google up to see who you are, and then I recalled you worked in a film called Delhi Belly which had a song called Bhag Bhag Bhosdike..hope you knew the meaning of “Bhosdike” before you signed for the film..this slang is against woman , hope you knew that ? ….and yes I recalled that extra ordinarily erotic scene of yours in that film because of which and other such extremely derogatory abuses the film was given an A certificate and you all fought against that decision….Anyways…
    Shenaz Treasurywala open letter
    Your letter literally moved me despite me being aware that you have a movie to be released in next few weeks, despite me being aware that celebs like you only wake up for social causes when you have a selfish interest to promote.Despite me wondering how this letter of yours reached to 20 websites together in one go ? Despite me being aware that celebs like you charge fee for appearing even at charity shows.!! So this sudden awakening of yours was little surprising…. anyways…..
    Shenaz, I wholeheartedly support your demand of very strong laws against such crimes , but have you read Nirbhaya Law even once ? Do you even know how stringent it is ? Still agree with you that there is huge scope of improvement and government must ensure things improve from their end. But if NAMO only could change everything , he would have that changed on16th May itself. By any chance, do we see our individual role in fighting this evil ? Rather do we even acknowledge that this evil is beyond law and order ? If not, do we expect our streets to be deployed with policemen all over just to keep a vigil on each and every girl and boy roaming around ? You said you were groped multiple times (I am sorry about that) but how does law and order take care of it unless you complain ? A girl dates a stranger boy, goes to his apartment, gets raped by boy and his friends , how do you see it as a law and order problem ? (Mumbai Police commissioner on record said 75% cases are such in which girl knew the boy) Or like other liberals , you too believe that deploying a full battalion in front of each and every pub in the city would solve all the problem ? Having said that, I have no intentions to make this writeup some kind of a patriarchal advisory for woman, as what to wear, where to go, what time to go etc..
    Thus, for few minutes if you are ready to believe this issue is beyond law and order, let me take you to the other side of the story….
    An XYX deo brand would claim , use me and get a woman , an underwear company would claim , wear me and get a woman , a condom company would claim , wear me and get a woman, you watch any movie the only role of an actress would be to please the actor and the audience …nothing else..this literal objectification of woman is hundred times uglier than what “manusmriti” did thousands of years back. So when day and night everyone everywhere is talking about “getting a woman” , how would you control a sick guy“getting” a lonely woman in a train compartment on his own ? forcefully this time though. Have you celebs ever sat ( at least over a cocktail party ) and discussed what effect your Ads , your movies have on society ?
    Did you ever raise your voice against producers signing Sunny leone one after the other as lead actress , ever objected as to what her eligibility is as an artist ? Have you celebs discussed such issues with Ad makers who present women as mere sexual target ? Have you raised your voice when a script writer portrays a woman as an “object” ? You know what…you guys create such frustrated assholes in society gradually …you guys act as a slow poison in society because the same people look upon you, they follow you blindly, they believe you, they ape you to whatever you show on the screen !!
    I am not saying just films or just ads or just porn or just parenthood is responsible for rapes or sexual assault on woman ,but all such topics are contributors in different forms and proportions to the making of a rapist. Those developed liberal societies who decades back resisted against banning of sexually explicit content , who did not oppose objectification of woman in the name of free and liberal society are heavily suffering now and will continue to suffer , India has just started to suffer and it will suffer badly because it is a heterogeneous society , because our family upbringing varies drastically depending upon which part of a society we are in and hence our reaction to different situations also differ.Thus, as a typical sexual content affects different age groups differently,it also affects different people from different backgrounds differently. Take out testimonies of rapists,most of them said they used to watch porn on mobile and could not control afterwards. Till how long we would bury our heads in sand and not acknowledge this fact ?
    Shenaz, Lastly, If you were even one percent sincere in writing this letter, would you consider pledging that –
    1. You would not do any film or Ad or show which objectify woman or portray them in bad light.
    2. You would boycott perfumes / Deos / Under Garments brands and other such products which purposely bring lust in their themes and present woman as a sexual target ?
    3. Make and promote clean films enriched with values of morality and respect for woman . And yes, rather than love/hate/sex stories , promote films based on science (oops …films based on science is difficult from you folks..so please ignore )
    The expectation of zero tolerance from law makers is all OK , but bring that “zero tolerance” in yourself against any form of insult to womanhood. Hope I did not ask too much. By the way, good luck for your upcoming movie as apart from the usual law and order rant , that is the only take away I get from your letter….!!

  3. Awesome, Speechless. I wish and hope this open letter is published in a main stream news website like ibnlive.com or rediff.com.

    I know nddtv will not publish this even if Mr Prannay Roy himself is implicated in a false Rape Case. Because for Mr Pranay Roy, Hypocrisy is more important that even his own honor

  4. NAVEEN KUMAR says:

    well, hats off ma’m !!!

  5. cruiserdeep says:

    Reblogged this on Cruiserdeep’s Weblog and commented:
    Here is an open letter to Shenaz’s open letter!

  6. Jee Non says:

    Tank u,i fed-up arguing with my friends in logical way.For them Indian males are rapists,thanks to biased Inter/National media brainwash

  7. Ashok says:

    Excellent Deepika..!! The things that you have mentioned reflects the ground reality in our country. Your efforts are really admirable. We all can understand what Ms.Shenaz Treasurywala is expecting to gain through this publicity stunt. I wish atleast after reading your reply she understands the difference between mere ‘ACCUSATION’ and ‘ANALYSIS’.

  8. rittupaul01 says:

    I shared shenaz’s open letter in fb as I m concerned abt women safety, ignoring d fact dat I too was called a criminal as I m a man of India coz ppl calling me criminal is a very very minute issue infront of d need of d hour i.e ‘women safety’. But ur letter made me speechless…wow!!! I want to meet u, coz I am happy to know dat my country still has citizens who think in a broader prospect. Respect!!!!

  9. Ayan Sinha says:

    Bravo Deepuka!!!!!!

  10. Manik says:

    You are awesome Deepika. Have been following you since the past 6 months. You’re doing a fab job.
    I still consider Shehnaz’s outcry as a publicity stunt to boost her latest film. Why the open letters now ? What not in the past ? Why not after the occurrence of the most infamous rape incident ever to have rocked the nation ? Having said that, I sympathize with her for the troubles that she had to face for being a woman. It’s a very sad aspect of today’s society and that needs to be changed by people. However, some of the demands women make are not only unreasonable but also illogical.

    My moot points are 1.You can’t hang a rapist(or for that matter, anybody) without a fair trial. Moreover, hanging someone for rape isn’t justice. Life imprisonment is such a bad punishment in itself. An entire life ruined in a pothole of s**t. 2.Castration and such sick punishments will not be accepted in India. We’re not Iraq, Iran or Afghanistan and we for sure as hell don’t beat up our rape victims with stones. 3.What about the women who use the harassment laws per their own advantage ? Any random girl walking on the street can lodge a complaint against me(without my having done anything wrong) and I’d be locked up immediately, probably beaten up by cops. She can use the law to extort money from me. Where’s the darn equality ? 4. Every women-rights argument usually starts with a misandristic comment & ends with the male defendant being labelled as a mcp(male chauvinist pig). I’ve been addressed the same by many of my female friends for whom gender equality and women empowerment is all about abusing, ridiculing, dominating the few good men, that according to them do not exist anymore. That’s an irony per se as the past centuries have had more share of abusive, jingoists than the current. Why force me to accept your dominance? Why not be a true partner, an equal ? Why try to boss me over every issue and label me a mcp if I object ? Don’t I have any rights of my own ? Why so much hypocrisy ?
    Proud to be a mcp if being just is being chauvinistic.

  11. aQeel says:

    Speechless

  12. Bharti says:

    What a solace to see someone can still think sensibly. Your last sentence says its all in shortest and best way possible – ” If we are asking for equality, let it be TRUE EQUALITY and not playing victim card as per convenience. Otherwise the entire cry for equality is a farce.”

    Kudos to you for having such clear thoughts!

  13. Rammohan says:

    Awesome and I am awestruck

  14. neha says:

    let us not take it to regional level. when are we going to rise above comparison. i think shenaz’s was an emotional story. she took pieces from her life and i can relate to it. please do not take it to some other level. instead of empathizing with her you are ready to point out her mistakes. can we just be united for one thing at least.

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      I dunno why did you feel I did not empathized with her. Please read the letter again. I only urged her to write it to the right people and perhaps look at other side of the rape story too. Thanks for reading Neha.

  15. Anupa says:

    I dont know who you are, but i dont think you open letter is constructive at all. So you can stop copying Shehnaz who may be doing this for publicity but has at least reached out to important people for a problem that is serious and needs to be solved. Your letter on the other hand does nothing for anyone.

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      You would never find it constructive because i have written things which aren’t easy to digest but are facts. I hope you read the links I shared in the post. Would be glad to hear your counter theories. Also, please let me know what Shenaz’s letter did apart from instilling more and more fear among women.

      • Shri says:

        Deepika .. who ever you are … your letter may be very impressive to read for some ppl but far away from reality what every gal faces on streets … and Self Defense classes .. LOL .. are you kidding ??? 4-5 men holding a gal on knife point or iron rod (Nirbhaya case) and you expect a gal to behave like they show in Hollywood action movies … funny … What Shehnaz requested a severe punishment for these animals and you think this is wrong ? Then sweetheart wait for your turn then may be you will feel emotions that Shehnaz expressed …

      • xpressionsDeepika says:

        Dear Shri,

        I hope you read my letter again in its entirety again and then draw conclusions. First – Shenaz did not request punishment for animals but any man who is accused as a rapist. Second – She demanded punishment for any man who touches a woman. Third – self defense should be must for every girl and made mandatory if we really want our girls to be strong. If we want men to learn everything that a woman does, why aren’t we preparing our girls to be more strong and physically fit ? It’s not only to fight in case of adversities, but to present it to the world that no one can dare mess with them. I gave you a picture of what’s happening in the society and how many rapes are the rapes we understand is rape but if you choose to ignore that then….your wish. I NEVER FOR ONCE stated that a man who has raped a woman should not be punished. Please read the article AGAIN. Last – even if I am violated by one man, I wouldn’t tag the entire manhood as criminals. Just too myopic a view for me.

      • Shri says:

        A person who is committing such heinous crime is equivalent to animal and infact worst than animal. And this is true and most of the gals will accept this fact that they dont feel safe here. I’ve also spent few year outside India and I never have to worry what time it is what I m wearing and if some one is stalking me following me giving me dirty look passing lewd remarks … but this is not same here … a normal girl have to go through all these things everyday here … and guys doing it are not rapist or criminals they are just normal guys … If there is a group of guys around street a girl can not pass thru that way widout hearing or experiencing any of these things.. Who are they ? our men … There are some nice men too but when we normal gals complaint about it …its about that particular segment of society who feels its ok to do all the dirty things with gals coz they are men. You are right that as per data only 35% cases were actually rape cases … but then ppl who are committing this 35% of crime what punishment they are getting? Just because this is smaller percentage we should ignore the fact that in this society of ours even 6 yr old gal is not safe ? Have we not promoted that Uber Taxi driver who after committing so many crimes was still so confident that this time also he will come out clean. And when you say “you should ask this question to the woman who compromised the case” this is exactly same as saying why gals wearing western dresses … they shudn have gone out so late night … or they shudn take alcohol else this will happen … because in India rape case rate is 2% so we should feel proud …

  16. Avinash says:

    Awesome letter. You wrote what I was thinking. Recently a woman almost bumped into my vehicle with her car, wantingly and I was scared to chase her car and take a pic of the number plate. I thought what if she files a false counter complaint . There are women who are genuinely in need, but there are many more who are just finding loopholes and making use of this , just like the dowry law. Your letter is absolutely brilliant and echoes the thought of most men(good men) in the country , who now feel helpless in such situations. Think about the #rohtaksisters case, media went gaga over it, now it seems these girls have done this many time to blackmail innocent boys, to extort money. Also abt equality, bang on. If women want equality, learn to be equal n not play the victim card as per convenience. My thoughts go out to women who really suffer at the hands of those pyscopath rapists, but I am equally scared about women playing victim card and law punishing innocent guys. Its a thin line, and its time all of us started to behave like Human beings and stop acting like cannibals.

  17. I hope the whole nation sees ur work and reacts sensibly.

  18. Sharmi says:

    This is an extremely stupid and mysogonist account of things in India at the moment. For years, men and politicians have picked up the case of false accusations against men to shield what is happening to women in our country!!! For centuries, the justice system has been titled towards men. We need a lop-sided push for women to achieve the true equality that the author speaks about. Rape is a heinous crime that destroys a woman both physically and morally and cannot be compared with false accusations. The only reason statistics favor India is because our patriarchal value system stops women from reporting the crime. Before she (or whichever mysogynist political organization is funding her) asks women to be strong, she really needs to understand the psychological and cultural barriers that stop women from magically becoming “strong”! I urge men to be “strong” and not rape women!

    I think at this point of time, bringing the other side of the coin is the last thing the country needs. There are gigantic statistics in MIT and Harvard that show that when female empowerment movements have taken place, the entire economy has moved forward. This is happening in India at this point of time. Let 50% of our population get their rightful safety. Trust me, once the bigger issue is solved, the other things like false accusations will automatically fall in their place and will rightfully be punished. This article is almost like worrying about your make-up when you have cancer!!

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Well surely parents filing rape cases against the boy when their daughter willingly elopes with a man is not misogynist to you but pretty empowering. Or an educated independent woman knowing every repercussion of her act filing a rape case on a promise unfulfilled too. You comfortably ignore that to maintain your argument. For sure a lesser issue than the main issue but certainly not one that can be ignored with changing scheme of things. I would request you to remember this post five years down the line. Would also urge you to do a bit of research by reading judgments on judis.nic.in and come back here if you think frivolous cases are also an injustice to genuine victims.

      • Sharmi says:

        Of course, people who are unlawfully charged with rape and other misconduct suffer greatly, as do their families. My problem with your article is that it makes it seem that women like to behave as victims. They ARE victims!! The issue you are addressing (parents filing rape or a filed love affair leading to charges of rape) is only a speck in the dunes of sexual violence, harassment and finally death that rape leads to. Unwomen.org reports that 20% of rape ultimately leads to death for the victim either by hands of the rapist or her own family or by herself.

        You are addressing a side issue and making it sound like that is the main issue. These issues like false accusation will be taken into account when the real laws are scripted. Our country allows a serial rapist to go on a bail!! Are you seriously kidding me when you say women should be strong!!

        At MIT, we are studying the neurosciences behind the mind of a rapist and a rape victim. I can say with the most objective authority of science that rape is the most heinous crime known to man and cannot even be compared with genocide!!! I saw this article on a FB post and I was disappointed that in an India where we are after generations of closing our eyes to this issue, finally we are openly speaking about it…such posts are adding noise to the real movement!

        Women are already speechless. Please stop gagging them further. The true justice will come to the men.

        That is why wars that have had serial rapes are considered even more heinous than some others!

        Please stop making side issues the bigger issues in the scheme of things!! Let strong laws be formed for the bigger subject at hand and trust me, evolution will ensure that corrections are made through iterations to protect the men whose cause you champion.

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      “We need a lop-sided push for women to achieve the true equality that the author speaks about” confirms your bias to me and your stand that you are okay to see innocents being punished/violated and legally raped to perhaps give justice to women. Such a blind view. Obviously no substance in your argument. Read up some history on crime against women and conviction rates in the past in India to eat up your own words. Your rant is nothing but FEMINIST CRY where all that you all want is – if it’s a MAN, hang him cuz he must have done something. Make-Up, Cancer? I am sure someone like you would have written the same comment 20 years ago when cases of dowry law misuse started emerging. We all know what’s happened to dowry law now. Imagine a similar situation with Rape laws. I can’t….maybe you can and would be alright with it.

      • Sharmi says:

        Dowry in the country is still a much larger problem than the misuse of the dowry law! Again, I am saying that solve the bigger issue first. Iterations will ensure that the side issue ( in my opinion a non-issue in the statistical angle of things) will take care of themselves.

      • xpressionsDeepika says:

        Can you suggest solve the issue how? DP Act prohibits give and take of dowry. Still people exchange it. Who’s the culprit here? How many weddings have you attended where dowry was exchanged? How many of your brothers accepted dowry? Or would you call that voluntary gifts? You know what. Everyone takes that. But when things fall apart. Everything becomes dowry. Why don’t people like you ask for a law that punishes parents if they don’t give part of their property to their daughter? That’s her right. But they won’t give it. And wipe their hands by giving dowry. Why aren’t women organizations taking ANY action against parents who forcefully marry their daughters and ruin their lives? Every law brings In Laws to task. Almost equal number of women commit suicide in their own homes as their in laws home. While the latter is conveniently called dowry death, what happens to the former? Change is needed from many sides but the fear mongering by feminists decide where they want their target to be. WOULD YOU PLEDGE THAT ANY WEDDING YOU GO TO NOW, YOU WOULD ASK THE BRIDE AND GROOM TO SIGN A NO DOWRY CERTIFICATE? If not, shame!

      • Sharmi says:

        Kindly don’t get personal. That is highly unprofessional of you! I First of all, since my great grandpa’s time, my family has refused to give or take dowry. Also, we have encouraged every person we know to do the same.

        Having said that, the law says both people who give and take dowry should be punished. You are fighting for 8% who suffer from the misuse of the law. What about the 92% who actually are killed by the horrible pain of third degree burns.

        My solution is steadfastly implement the laws. Everytime, a conviction is made, it deters other people. At the same time, educate the women and make her financially independent which makes it easier for her to leave her in-law’s and her parent’s house if necessary and live independently. The only reason why sometimes parents are shielded is because they have already been punished with the greatest punishment any parent can ever face : loss of a child.

        http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/rising-number-of-dowry-deaths-in-india-ncrb/article4995677.ece

        Anyways, I will now withdraw from your site because I see your unprofessionalism and inability to debate on true content.

    • Shri says:

      Really Glad Sharmi that someone is talking some sense here …

      • Rajesh says:

        Yeah! Whoever talks for women and against men makes sense right? Applaud your feminism(female chauvinism)!

    • Ayan Sinha says:

      Dear Sharmi,

      False accusation cannot be a side issue.if you read the Tennant of any law it has been said” let 100 guilty go free but not one innocent should be punished. ” by allowing stupid anti rape laws which allows vixen,evil minded women and collaborators to levy false accusation on men , the law and power to be is making a big mistake. By desrtoying lifes of innocent nen hiw do you think it will economy strong. I don’t know what study you are doing in MIT, but whatever you are doibg seem to be flawed . kindly wake up,…..the world has moved on and as Deepika said, women need to be strong and not take help of the twisted cruches of feminism. They can walk in step to step wuth men..

      • Sharmi says:

        The 100 guilty that go free prey on the 1000 innocents! We are not only talking about urban women here. We are talking about rural uneducated women who have been enslaved for years by the patriarchal bonds of their families. We are talking about children who are getting raped in schools.

        Yes. They should let the 100 guilty go free as we have done for years in our country resulting in the state it is in today so that more of our children get raped.

        I think you and the author of this piece should wake up!

    • Roshan Durve says:

      Just wait for your turn Sharmi, when the gender biased laws which you support would be used against men of your family.

  19. mugukanna says:

    Excellent .. i hope this could open the eyes of many ppl

  20. sudhir says:

    well i just remember this so called shehnaz treasurewala…..from the movie delhi belly.she has a scene where by imran khan goes down licking her and c complaints that his beards are itching and tickling her.bitch can act in such scenes and now she has a lot to speak.it just shows how big and loose butthole she is.

  21. ADW says:

    Deepika Narayan Bhardwaj, i appreciate your effort, nicely written(unlike that of ms. Shenaz). But you should have taken in consideration a small fact that did Shenaz actually ‘think’ before writing her letter. It was just an out burst of (personal) emotions on her part. Resulting in a dumb poorly written document. The problem in that people are more inclined to morons than to thinkers when it comes to solving problems. How many would have read a long PhD thesis which deals with the same issue of sexual violence with the same interest that of that dumb letter? May be 1 in 1000. I saw that letter’s link recieving 10000’s of likes on various social networking sites. It would come as a surprise if Shenaz actually responded to this thoughtfully drafted letter. 🙂

  22. Sheetal says:

    Good one!!! To add to this, I would also say that the letter by Shenaz was nothing but a publicity stunt…she just wants attention to earn more money since her movie is about to release..she wants that people identify her and watch her movie….do u really think what she has mentioned in the letter is all true?? First of all if she had so much daring, she could have slapped some men then and there or filed a complaint…Secondly, if she really felt so bad when she was touched by men so many times why did she enter Entertainment industry where you know what happens…..there are already so many laws to protect women which are being misused…adding more laws meaning giving more power to women to misuse laws….to conclude..letter by Shenaz was just bullshit!!!!

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Sheetal I wouldn’t really want to ridicule anyone’s efforts by calling it a publicity stunt because she might have felt enraged, she might have got her nerves boiling, she might have got her NOT anymore moment and she wrote that letter. But the problem I found in her letter is gross generalization and blaming every man is a rapist molester!

    • Ritu says:

      Omg victim blaming to the fullest degree on this page, I give up!!

      • xpressionsDeepika says:

        Ever read a single judgment on Judis.nic.in on rape cases in last one year. Go read that before you comment. Do get back.

  23. Poornima Dinesh says:

    In India men are unsafe because of biased law…women are taking advantage and harassing husband and his family…in our country divorce cases are going on for so many years.. Valuable time is wasted to fight the divorce case ..only Tarik pe Tarik…Moduli’s government should strong action. Wife can get divorce easily but husband got no right.law should be equal

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Thanks Poornima for writing in. Have you yourself seen such cases? Please do share if yes.

    • Sheetal says:

      Very good one. Completely agree with you!! So happy to read this..that there are at least some females out there who understands..

      • Sheetal says:

        I meant thanks to Poornima!!! Also to you Deepika for this letter to Shenaz. Agree with you on generalization that has been mentioned in Shenaz’s letter.

  24. amit says:

    nice one deepu, love u loads carry on ur good work

  25. Shrihari Kulkarni says:

    True.
    But I only see positive in Shenaz’s letter. Its a desperate appeal from all the daughters, sisters and Mothers in our country to all the hero’s that includes our honorable PM too. Trust me; such appeal can not be made to Italy की बेटी / या <-उसी बेटी का बेटा, MMS, यादव or खुजलीवाल या और कोई… उनसे तो कुछ भी नहीं होनेवाला। अगर कोई कर सकता हैं तो वह हैं हमारे मोदीजी। Strong and swift law to which people fear – is the need of the hour. Only Modiji can bring that. About "shame on you" language used by Shenaz … even Modiji had understood it much before. Remember Modiji asking all parents in the nation to ASK questions to their sons first not to daughters?

    मैं कोई बडा editor नहीं ना कोई बडा लेखक; लेकीन एक बात जो मैं यहा समझता हूँ वह हैं – सबका साथ सबका विकास। It sure works. Only take positive out of her letter; censorship on movies don't work; US; UK had tried it decades back and have failed miserably. So they revolutionized their system and mindset of the people. Once again they took help of strict and swift law and IT'S IMPLEMENTATION. Modiji is also moving towards the same direction. Take heart – we sure will see अच्छे दिन.

  26. Shomit says:

    Too good.

    From the heart and very relevant. Media is abusing its power by over focusing on some things and this is just one of them. They are getting their viewership and indians are becoming scared individuals.

  27. Ankur Dayal says:

    somehow i disagree with Deepika’s letter.. it could very well be a publicity stunt considering her soon to be released film, but what if she really went through it? we should not reject or ridicule what she wrote, because if she really went through all that it would have taken real guts to write it in an open letter; specially what she wrote about her mother.. i can’t imagine a real person in this world could write something like this about her mother just for some cheap publicity.. she would have known people would have their doubts and would ridicule and make mockery. but she still went ahead and shared it.. also when Deepike in her letter says that rape cases are withdrawn afrer money exchanges i can’t believe it.. yes, there will be a small percentage of reported cases where that happens but most other cases i feel are withdrawn because of the social stigma that a rape allegation carries and on top of that the way our administration (including police and court) works.. if the police does not even let you report a lost mobile to not spoil their track record i see no reason why they would not pressurize a rape victim to withdraw her case.. and what amuses me most is that Deepika is trying to defend Delhi and claim it is safe.. i live in Delhi too and i have no qualms in saying it is NOT safe.. India Gate at night is as busy as a railway station in a city so i don’t think its the right example to give… i myself does not feel safe (and trust me i am not the only one who feels that way) driving in some parts of the city late at night.. Also, Shenaz is already a celeberity and a known figure since her MTV’s Most Wanted days.. Perhaps responding to her letter can bring more fame to Deepika then to Shenaz for her letter.. and may be thats what Deepika’s intent was.. who knows? i also have my rights to doubt a respnse to an open letter.. 🙂

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      I made my effort to bring another side of the truth. You can draw any conclusion. It wouldn’t bother me. To your point of asking money for a case – there is another blog I have written here itself, realy story of rape after Nikah. read that if you have time and you would know what I am saying. Yes exchanging rape case for money is a small number but it is a growing number. it is not my statement it is statement by those who see these cases day in day out – Lawyers.

  28. Zinia says:

    Hi Deepika, please provide an adequate, well-researched response, possibly with citations, to this following post which I received in reply to sharing your article. For some technical reasons, I am not able to have that person re-paste her comments in your blog but I will duly convey your response to her.

    The person wrote. “I try not to comment on such things but this response had me in such a rage that I have to

    A.) The article talks about victims turning hostile in court cases. Ever heard of trauma in rape victims and how it prevents them from even accepting that they were raped. Couple that with the huge stigma that rape carries in our culture it is not uncommon that witnesses withdraw there testimony. Pain/crime cannot be bartered in money but when cases in our country can run for 10 yrs at a go I would not blame the victim wanting to end reliving the same trauma every time she goes to the courts.

    B.) This article relies so heavily on victim blaming it is unbelievable that it was written by another woman. Shehnaz’s open letter albeit a poorly written one is imploring men to take charge of correcting their behaviors and help end the plight of women in India, she is right in saying that its “their shame, their fault” and that her dress has nothing to do with it. Even that sentiment is twisted by this blog’s author instead questioning about the fake rape cases in the country. WTF has that statistic to do with anything that Shehnaz asked? Yes it is a problem and yes there will always be some people who try to take undue advantage of such laws but does that mean that the rest of the people are liars too and they don’t deserve justice?

    C.) AND this is my biggest pet peeve, the author talks of quoting “data” and then berates Shehnaz for being too emotional and then goes ahead and quote The Hindu and Wikipedia as reliable sources LOL. Next thing you’ll start quoting opinions as data, oh wait you already did that!!!

    D.) But let me not undermine your painstaking research methods of wikipedia searching rape statistics. It says the “reported rate” is 2%. READ THAT AGAIN: Reported rate, therein lies your biggest problem, please read the damn article you quote as the first few paragraphs say “In many parts of the world, rape is very rarely reported, due to the extreme social stigma cast on women who have been raped, or the fear of being disowned by their families, or subjected to violence, including honor killings”. Throws your bogus statistics out the window.

    E.) Delhi court says that false rape cases are lagging other “true” cases behind, oh how very convenient of them to say that. A personal property dispute that has been in a delhi high court for the past 20 years is probably also because of all these false rape cases. “Damn these women can’t get their shit together making the court and police’s life harder, these women are the downfall of this great nation”.

    F.) Shehnaz says walking in Harlem and Bronx at 3 am is safe which is utter bullshit and I wish you would have used statistics to dispute THIS as robbery rarely goes unreported but instead you go and say that I have been to India gate at 3 am and never been raped, well good for you lady. In other news I have never gone hungry during a day so world hunger obviously doesn’t exist.

    Both articles are poorly written but at least Shehnaz wrote it under the pretense of being emotional. This author has none of those excuses. Peace out .”

  29. Ritu says:

    I try not to comment on such things but this response had me in such a rage that I have to

    A.) The article talks about victims turning hostile in court cases. Ever heard of trauma in rape victims and how it prevents them from even accepting that they were raped. Couple that with the huge stigma that rape carries in our culture it is not uncommon that witnesses withdraw there testimony. Pain/crime cannot be bartered in money but when cases in our country can run for 10 yrs at a go I would not blame the victim wanting to end reliving the same trauma every time she goes to the courts.

    B.) This article relies so heavily on victim blaming it is unbelievable that it was written by another woman. Shehnaz’s open letter albeit a poorly written one is imploring men to take charge of correcting their behaviors and help end the plight of women in India, she is right in saying that its “their shame, their fault” and that her dress has nothing to do with it. Even that sentiment is twisted by this blog’s author instead questioning about the fake rape cases in the country. WTF has that statistic to do with anything that Shehnaz asked? Yes it is a problem and yes there will always be some people who try to take undue advantage of such laws but does that mean that the rest of the people are liars too and they don’t deserve justice?

    C.) AND this is my biggest pet peeve, the author talks of quoting “data” and then berates Shehnaz for being too emotional and then goes ahead and quotes The Hindu and Wikipedia as reliable sources LOL. Next thing you’ll start quoting opinions as data, oh wait you already did that!!!

    D.) But let me not undermine your painstaking research methods of wikipedia searching rape statistics. It says the “reported rate” is 2%. READ THAT AGAIN: Reported rate, therein lies your biggest problem, please read the damn article you quote as the first few paragraphs say “In many parts of the world, rape is very rarely reported, due to the extreme social stigma cast on women who have been raped, or the fear of being disowned by their families, or subjected to violence, including honor killings”. Throws your bogus statistics out the window.

    E.) Delhi court says that false rape cases are lagging other “true” cases behind, oh how very convenient of them to say that. A personal property dispute that has been in a delhi high court for the past 20 years is probably also because of all these false rape cases. “Damn these women can’t get their shit together making the court and police’s life harder, these women are the downfall of this great nation”.

    F.) Shehnaz says walking in Harlem and Bronx at 3 am is safe which is utter bullshit and I wish you would have used statistics to dispute THIS as robbery rarely goes unreported but instead you go and say that I have been to India gate at 3 am and never been raped, well good for you lady. In other news I have never gone hungry during a day so world hunger obviously doesn’t exist.

    Both articles are poorly written but at least Shehnaz wrote it under the pretense of being emotional. This author has none of those excuses. Peace out ✌️

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Let me try and comment to you since you felt so enraged point by point:

      A.) The article talks about victims turning hostile in court cases. Ever heard of trauma in rape victims and how it prevents them from even accepting that they were raped. Couple that with the huge stigma that rape carries in our culture it is not uncommon that witnesses withdraw there testimony. Pain/crime cannot be bartered in money but when cases in our country can run for 10 yrs at a go I would not blame the victim wanting to end reliving the same trauma every time she goes to the courts.
      — Could you please highlight the lines where there is even an iota of victim blaming? For your eyes open but mind shut, read how I talk about Judicial reforms and hastening the process of Justice to victims and also punishment to anyone misusing the provisions. Yes it take 10 years 20 years for cases whose fault is it? The stigma that you talk about. Ma’am please go and read the judgments where the name of the victim is not even identified at the request of her while name, address every tiny detail of the accused whether guilty of the crime or not is splashed. I am sorry I don’t buy your argument of it not being easy for a woman to come to court today. I have been to courts and seen many cases. Would be a good idea if you go and check too. While it’s always impossible for a woman genuinely abused to ask for justice, the cases thronging the courts these days…..I wouldn’t completely believe what you are saying.

      B.) This article relies so heavily on victim blaming it is unbelievable that it was written by another woman. Shehnaz’s open letter albeit a poorly written one is imploring men to take charge of correcting their behaviors and help end the plight of women in India, she is right in saying that its “their shame, their fault” and that her dress has nothing to do with it. Even that sentiment is twisted by this blog’s author instead questioning about the fake rape cases in the country. WTF has that statistic to do with anything that Shehnaz asked? Yes it is a problem and yes there will always be some people who try to take undue advantage of such laws but does that mean that the rest of the people are liars too and they don’t deserve justice?

      Never said everyone is lying. Asked her to make a plea to nip another problem in the bud too. Asked her to question the woman who reached a compromise when the driver was already in Jail for seven months or several others who file a case and then demand money.

      C.) AND this is my biggest pet peeve, the author talks of quoting “data” and then berates Shehnaz for being too emotional and then goes ahead and quotes The Hindu and Wikipedia as reliable sources LOL. Next thing you’ll start quoting opinions as data, oh wait you already did that!!!

      I pity you. The HIndu research was done by a woman over six months. I would any day believe a research that analysed every single case rather than again the rhetorics you have put forth. As far as under reporting is concerned, the numbers are almost similar in India and US. So there goes your argument to the drain. Also, countries like US don’t have rape on promise of marriage puhleeez.

      D.) But let me not undermine your painstaking research methods of wikipedia searching rape statistics. It says the “reported rate” is 2%. READ THAT AGAIN: Reported rate, therein lies your biggest problem, please read the damn article you quote as the first few paragraphs say “In many parts of the world, rape is very rarely reported, due to the extreme social stigma cast on women who have been raped, or the fear of being disowned by their families, or subjected to violence, including honor killings”. Throws your bogus statistics out the window.

      I already replied to that. Yes bring the entire CAW in this discussion and then let me tell you, 50% of total CAW is 498A cases. I wouldn’t even care to delve any further on that. I am sure you read enough to know what our SC and HCs have said about the law. So there again your rage is uncalled for.

      E.) Delhi court says that false rape cases are lagging other “true” cases behind, oh how very convenient of them to say that. A personal property dispute that has been in a delhi high court for the past 20 years is probably also because of all these false rape cases. “Damn these women can’t get their shit together making the court and police’s life harder, these women are the downfall of this great nation”.

      They tried to highlight an issue. Sure women would never want to be blamed for any damn things. For you, every woman is a purist and every man is a criminal. You get so enraged when someone tries to bring out other facts. You feel so enraged if even one woman is questioned. Sorry you are too obsessed with your ideas.

      F.) Shehnaz says walking in Harlem and Bronx at 3 am is safe which is utter bullshit and I wish you would have used statistics to dispute THIS as robbery rarely goes unreported but instead you go and say that I have been to India gate at 3 am and never been raped, well good for you lady. In other news I have never gone hungry during a day so world hunger obviously doesn’t exist.

      Please tell me about a rape that happened at India Gate. Puhleeeez.

      Both articles are poorly written but at least Shehnaz wrote it under the pretense of being emotional. This author has none of those excuses. Peace out ✌️

      I had none of those excuses but to show mirror to many women like you who live in a false view that women can’t be wrong. Justice needs to be given to victims and I am completely in favor of strictest punishment to a rapist or any man who has violated a woman. but sorry ma’am crime is a crime and not perception of a crime. If a man doesn’t marry after promising, it’s a breach of trust (in case he promised in the first place) it’s not rape..ohh well it is under the law…pity women filing these cases actually had a desire to marry their rapists. You know what – go read judis.nic.in and some of the rape case judgments. I read SIX yesterday …orders under which were passed in a gap of just 8 days. Lady – all of them were false, including a gang rape. You and all your clan take life of a man so CHEAP. Even if he has been accused falsely your clan wants them to be hanged just because another man did something wrong. Grow Up.

  30. Aatif says:

    Very impressive reply to Shenaz.!! She doesn’t know the absolute fact about crime or crime against women in India and called forth with feminine emotions which could sadly malign the image of innocents. She is ignorant and irresponsible. Clap.! If i end my write up by saying only these few lines, i might get a few likes on this comment. But since it’ll shade off my purpose to retort this post, i’ll continue. I don’t overlook even the slimmest possibility of publicity stunt by Shenaz for her film released on 12 Dec, but still her points are quite VALID. She prominently pointed out the fact that breaking law-order or committing crimes by criminals and rather penalizing them accordingly, setting them to free has become duck soup in India. Isn’t it true ? Why it happens? Is it only reason that victims impose false allegations and latter turn hostile ? Or victims allegations are genuine but they are latter forced to turn hostile ? Or they don’t have enough resources to fight against the monster goons ? I remember a case in which a dowry victim Neha Yadav, 29, who was set on fire by her in-laws in west delhi sagarpur in front of her five-year-old son and latter she succumbed to death. She was being tortured by her husband and in-laws but the police had been shielding the culprits and chose to turn a blind eye to her repeated complaints. It reminds me the sordid tale of policy apathy, insensitivity and police callousness. Latter her in laws released on bail by the city court, moving freely and have been threatening his family. In Gudia’s case (a 5 old girl), she brutally raped by a neighbour after holding her captive for four days in east Delhi’s Gandhi Nagar area. The minor’s family claimed that the police was insensitive by not registering a case in time and that some policemen told them that they should be happy that the girl was alive. Shockingly the SHO, area police station chief had tried to bribe her family with Rs.2,000 to hush up the incident as the vigilance report confirmed the same after probe. Another case of Ashiana colony, UP gang rape, a 13 yr old victim. It was evening when the 13 year old daughter of a labourer was returning to her hutment at Rajni Khand after attending the household jobs at a few of the houses in Ashiana colony. The girl was dragged into the car, tortured mercilessly and raped by 4 goons, one of them was don-turned SP leader Anna Shukla’s nephew Gauarv. Initially, the pressure from State Women Commission forced the cops to send an innocent Feroz to jail in the case even though the cops had identified the real culprits then. Gaurav is free now because he hail from a don-politician family. There are so many similar cases happen all day. Culprits either belong to a mafia or any other powerful background and it becomes impossible for victims to fight with them. In many cases Victims are not given attentions, police refuse to lodge FIR, proper protection is not given to the victims etc. Eventually who is suffering and who is responsible ? Do you still think that victim turns hostile is the only reason for the mess and progressively increasing the assault cases ? In a recent Uber driver rape case in Delhi, it was being discussed that how a serial offender and having criminal background could be allowed to join a taxi agency ! Wasn’t there any appropriate criteria in the agency to qualify before joining? But no one bother about the way over 50% frauds, criminals and rapist in the parliament, who represent us.!! It’s time to wake up and stand with unity against the rotten system. It’s time to think about our next generation’s future.!

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      I don’t deny anything written by you. I hope you read the my letter in entirety. I call for police reforms and judicial reforms for quick justice to the victims and also punish the ones misusing the law. How difficult is that to digest? I am not disagreeing to what you are saying and the ghastly incidents you have mentioned. But sorry I would not turn a blind eye to other rising menace too. When I say hostile I was talking about the cases where monetary settlements are made or the reason behind filing the case was to force the boy into marriage. Are these rapes? If in these cases the woman marries the boy eventually she has basically married her rapist? We need to think about future of our generations for sure. That’s why I am urging people to look the menace of false cases too because it is not only misusing the law but a bigger crime against the genuine victims. I don’t form opinions just by reading newspapers. I have met several women in crime against women cells. Spoken to them. Try doing that you might be informed about some bitter truths. Thanks for reading and responding.

  31. Thanks for writing such a wonderful reply. I don’t care if Shenaz did this for publicity or not. But I feel alarmed when educated women start to “like” her post merely because they identify with the pain.

  32. Mamta gupta says:

    No doubt Deepika Narayan Bhardwaj, what you are trying to say is the moral degradation of society where people especially women are misusing law to make things in their favour. We all experience such things in our lives but nobody has tried like you to put forth the facts before all. its really a commendable job by you.

  33. Ankur Dayal says:

    Deepika ji, if you have guts to write a response to a open letter i wish you had guts to accept criticism of your letter and not remove my comments.. its super easy to criticise but one needs a real character to be able to take criticism in right stride.. anyways good luck for your writing..

    • Ankur Dayal says:

      ooops.. sorry i was too quick to write above comment.. i somehow could not find my comment so thought it was removed.. but i now can still see it pending for moderation.. my apologies for commenting too soon..

  34. sandeep says:

    brilliant indeed deepika-i just hope that the thot process seeps into many minds and we realize that it is not abt women or men -it is the cruelty and torture that good humans face because of unhealthy and scums of human society,i wont say much as it is already discussed in so many views-gud going deepika-keep it up!

  35. Ish says:

    I appreciate your comment…works for middle and upper middle class .Although, still remember the icky feeling of being groped when I was pregnant and being flashed at when I was walking alone. Like it or not it exists in India, more so than other countries. For sure woman portrayal in the recent movies does not help…… But let us face it the poor women do have it really bad…statistics do not include them.. ok no proof of rape or abuse ..but acid attack on women rarely happens in the west but is pretty rampant in India and Pakistan. .even in such cases justice has been denied. Imagine living with a acid burnt face and body for the rest of your life…..

  36. Nivi says:

    There are points in this letter as well as the original Shehnaz letter that make sense. But nothing can justify the point that such incidents happen. The fact that not all victims appear or turn hostile is because of the fact that as a society we don’t support/empathize with rape victims, hence, a victim faces tremendous pressure from society and family not to pursue the case further. We stay in a society where we have made peace with the fact that Eve teasing, inappropriate touching etc are a part of our lives.I think girls are equally to blame for such condition because rarely have i seen a lady/girl speak against such things happening. People who indulge in such practices are cowards, and if once they get resistance/slap/rough handing from a girl they tried to tease, will think twice before doing it again.

    I have myself made sure that i never have let an eve teaser go without at least a slap. My father always told me “Not to come home crying after someone teased you” INSTEAD “Give the other person what he deserves”. I have a daughter now and i will make sure she learns the same.

    We shouldn’t forget, anyone who puts up with nonsense is as much guilty as the person who thinks its cool to be non-sensical.

  37. speaksameer says:

    Not all khan are terrorists and not all men are rapists. Lets us all stop being biased towards certain people just becuase they follow islam and let us all not bring it to a point that each man is poised as rapist to girls. My reply. https://dramacraticindia.wordpress.com/2014/12/18/an-open-letter-to-shehnaz-treasurywala/

  38. speaksameer says:

    Well said… Loved your blog.

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