Move beyond SELF to fight for a CAUSE…..

Posted: October 17, 2012 in Uncategorized

“Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness” – Martin Luther King Jr. **

No matter how true the quote mentioned above by Martin Luther King Jr is, the hard fact of life is, altruism comes at a much greater price than selfishness. In fact in the race of life, comfortable in the daily rigmarole – as we grow, we often start ignoring anything that takes us away from our comfort zone. The only actions that drive us, if we ponder, are ones that our sub conscious is absolutely used to. And the more and more we succumb to this comfort zone, our zeal to challenge and question the status quo dies…..

Why am I writing this…….

Well, I was also comfortable and ensconced in my comfort zone until few days ago when I decided to wake up and do something for a cause I had been thinking about for the past couple of months. It is not easy to fight for something that doesn’t impact you directly, or for something you can have a way out of….but if you give in to injustice once, good chances you would never muster courage to fight it ever.

I was also not able to muster the courage to stand up for a cause that I truly believed in. But I could never give away the feeling , the guilt that I bowed down to injustice and that’s where the thought of my documentary on misuse of section 498A was born. A gross injustice to men and their families – its a pain that many in this country are going through but still everyone is far away from any sense of relief.

Working on the documentary, I have been thinking that when thousands and millions in this country have been a victim of this law, how come no heed has been paid to amend it. Watching this video below, I realized the reason behind the same……

Many of you must have come across this video given the recent attack on Malala Yusufzai. For those who din’t….Malala and thousands of other kids were thrown out of the schools in Swat district of Pakistan by Taliban. This young, brave and committed girl has sworn to change things,however. Caring least about her life, she is fighting for rights of everyone around.

Malala leaves a very strong message in this video….a message many among us don’t dare to even think about….THAT TO WORK FOR A CAUSE, WE NEED TO MOVE BEYOND SELF…….

Malala shares how she had the option to go to a boarding school after her studies were interrupted. But I love the way she says – that she realized that if “She” goes to school, everyone else would be left behind with no future of theirs.

If I draw a simile to the situation of men in this country who have particularly been victimized cuz of gender biased dowry and violence laws, I see that we have very few Malala’s here. Most of the people still have their thoughts limited to “my case, my suffering, my rescue and my life.” There are very few like Malala who are fighting for the cause of future of others, leaving their self behind……

We get happy thinking that we have got away with things and money is dust of hand which will come and go but we ignore the future that we are creating – More and more people would become strong to skew things in their favor, Honesty would be taken for a ride..emotions for a roll. The demands would become higher and higher and proving innocence tougher and tougher. It would be then that we would feel….had we stood up for the cause 😦

I came across an article today in TOI on page..(i dunno which towards the last) ..extreme right hand corner in the bottom where a news about torture of an old lady by her daughter in law was mentioned. That wicked daughter in law had attempted to killed her Mother in law and left her at the doors of AIIMS in order to acquire the entire property. The news said that the matter will be probed….had a Mother in law done something like this with her daughter in law…she would have been behind bars until now and the family running helter-skelter to hide their faces. But the media doesn’t care to show the other side of the coin as well. To fight a system like that…we have a long way to go…..

We need many more crusaders for the cause of “Justice for Men”. Until and unless we come together leaving our individual cases aside, we would never be able to make a larger impact. Else, the talibanese laws would kill the future of not few but thousands of men of this country…..

Its time we realize this and surge ahead………….

**Quote Courtesy –

  1. navneetmfrpf says:

    thank u deepika ji. u are helping the person who really needs help.

  2. Warrior Rocks says:

    Its encouraging to see women wanting to be associated to this cause. It sounds or is depicted as a men’s struggle against gender biased Indian laws but truth of the matter is – and people suffering attest this repeatedly – that women get victimized by this all the time be in the form of sisters, mothers, grand-mothers, sister-in-laws, nieces. Yet, NCW and WCD conveniently continue to look the other way to wash their hands off the gruesome injustice being meted out to this section of the womenfolk. We talk of India rising or a Vision 2020 and dont leave a chance to compare against the western civilized world, yet such medieval-type laws (only that the gender is reversed now) are keeping India’s youth from contributing to the cause. Its a pity to see the brightest of brains spending their time towards chalking the next strategy to out-wit the judicial system itself when its the latter that the former should be relying upon for timely justice since in this case justice delayed is indeed justice denied. It pains to no end to see energy being “wasted” like this. High time that the law commission realizes the folly that has crept into the legal system and is at the mercy of unscrupulous women.

    Anyways, coming back to my original point, kudos to you to muster up the courage to write up even though it was at a passive behest of a 14-yr old. We need more of you – both women and journos – to join the movement.

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Dear Warrior,

      Great response and absolute truth.

      Just wanted to share its not the girl who helped me muster up courage to write this blog, but she made me realize the reason behind the movement not gaining big momentum. I started working for the cause couple of months ago and sure that my efforts will pay back.

      • Warrior Rocks says:


        While you sound motivated, is there a plan on how you intend on publicizing the cause you want to root for? Sure, there are no short cuts here and things would take time to change but focus and persistence are the key. Mass movement which it needs to be requires law commission accountable. There are smart brains there but their views/feedback are masked by politics and vested interest groups.

        There is no scope of gender bias if India has to develop. Sure there are genuine instances which make such laws relevant though justice for them should not come at the cost of others getting unnecessarily victimized. The more one thinks of such laws, the sense of shame deepens for how could we have such laws in the 21st century in a country booming with youthful energy and zest of go-getters.

      • xpressionsDeepika says:

        Dear Warrior, It’s a long fight and everyone is playing their part. I am doing so by making a documentary ‘Martyrs of Marriage’ and other people are doing it in their own way. I am sure things are making a difference as there is much stronger debate on these issues…more than every. Somewhere things are paying back.

  3. Amit says:

    its correct and we neec to come together and continue the fight but how we can stand together and what is the initial stage to boost up the people.

    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Hi Amit, thanks for writing in. The moment needs efforts from every nook and corner. It can start as small as taking your friends along with you to your local court with a Banner – Victim of 498A? Contact Us – and share with them that there is an organization like SIFF to help them. Meet them and tell them that they are not the only one sufffering due to this. More than the law, it is the social stigma that troubles people. So help them and tell them they are not at fault. Organize meetings with help of your RWA and tell them that cases like these are coming into limelight and it is the truth…request them to hold a meeting in your area. These are little things we can do to make this movement very large!

  4. hytesh sharma says:

    hey its really good that someone out of all of us have got the courage n dedication to make this world understand that the legal procedures being followed under Indian jurisdiction are improper and gender based …… 498 a very stupid law which shows that our legal bodies are so stupid and impractical if we talk about FAIR JUSTICE ….. Everybody have a habit of criticizing things in life but in reality till the time we will not workout for getting it right nothing can be changed in life … So this step of creating awareness among the people is a great cause…. It will help innocent families n mens as a boost up for fighting their rights……

    WOMEN is no more a ABHLA NAARI….. She have got everything same as men do have in life from tip to top……

    A real example of womens domination is the fact that OUR NATION IS BEING DERIVED BY A WOMEN named SONIA GANDHI…… PURE business LADY who is only worried to make lot of money out from INDIA & she is working towards her goal with her complete FAMILY…

    Dr, MANMOHAN SINGH an educated PUPPET who is dancing on SONIA GANDHI’S music …..SO WE SHOULD STEP AHEAD TOGETHER for removing all this crap whats happenin around us..



    • xpressionsDeepika says:

      Thanks for your words Hitesh. Completely agree to your thoughts. Our leadership is absolutely screwed. When our Law Minister himself is siphoning off funds, what expectation can we have from the lawmakers of this society?

      We are doomed for a No Future…the rich will keep getting rich and the middle class will get poorer with these screwed laws.

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